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15 July 2009

I Got Scared

I have been very quiet lately. I was just in that gray corner of my world because I thought I had a serious lump to deal with. I am not new to having lumps because I had one extracted from the right side of my chest when I was 18. Back then, breast cancer is never heard of so I did not have my small lump taken for biopsy. The doctor said it was a benign cyst and that was it. No explanation, nothing.
Many years have passed and my scar has healed. Lately, I noticed a bigger lump just under my right armpit or the axillary area. The lump at times would have a tingling sensation and sometimes painful. I got scared! I was flooded with bad thoughts because breast cancer or lymphomas are now very common. I had serious crying spells, sleepless nights, and dark moods.
I decided to have my armpit checked by a specialist. I had my ultrasound last Monday. I received my result the same day but have the diagnosis read yesterday. The interval between Monday and Tuesday seemed like eternity as I waited and wondered for the "what if." I prayed so hard that it was nothing serious or something I could not handle. The verdict - benign lipoma. I will talk about lipoma some other time. For now, let me just glorify our Lord for hearing my prayers.
The doctor advised me to not take any hormonal pills but to lose weight. Yes my dear family and friends, I am a fatty! So there, I have to lose weight. Probably, I will chronicle my experience as I go full-speed on my weight loss goal. I have to not for vanity sake but for my health and my family.
These past few weeks have been very, very hard on me. I am glad it is over and I have to be strict with my food intake or I am just fooling myself.
Thank you Lord for being by my side during this whole ordeal when I did not know what was happening and what would happen. Thank you so much.

3 comments :

  1. dear u have to tell me what benign lipoma is.. am worried nmn bigla pag ganyan tlgang mga words kkatakot basahin e

    but i hope ur alright.. i will pray for u as always!!

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  2. I have a similar problem actually but I am simply ignoring it though it worries me really. I am a bit scared of going back to have a collorary check up after getting the mammo last year. Well, I haven't had any breast concern before but this lump in the right axilla started to bother me and I thought this might indicate breast cancer. My mammo was negative though, thanks God! But I am not 100% safe of course. I am supposed to get another mammo this year. Just like you there was one time that I panicked and had serious crying spells and that's because a friend of mine was diagnosed of breast cancer stage 4 which then prompted me to finally submit for a mammo. Well, I think I should also see a specialist for my problem and not wait until it's late to put in in check. Take care, Ria

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  3. thanks ladies...God is by my side.

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