How to Thwart a Raging Bull

-- This is a repost. I have written this many moons ago when I was still in a different department. Things have changed recently. And as I recall how much I have been motivating and reminding myself how wonderful life is - I stumble upon this post I have written with humor. For those who can relate, I hope the tips below can help you recover or at least deal with the situation and the perpetrator. For those who are blessed to enjoy the peace and quiet of being at home full time, share this to those you know who can apply it in their corporate lives. Enjoy the read!  --


Best answer to this is to run! Run for your life! Kidding aside, there's nothing more enraging than someone crushing your spirit especially if you've gotten up on the right side of the bed.

I woke up with a bright outlook in life one fine morning, smiling my blues away, looking forward to another day and screeeeeeeecccchhhhhhh..... wait a sec! What just happened? It's like a dream sequel and suddenly you woke up like someone threw cold water on your face. Yes, that happened to me at work. Again, no details will be spared but the crux of the matter is, some people just ruined my day in a fraction of a second! Wow, that's Guinness Book of World Records there for you!

I was upset the whole day because:

1. I felt hurt.
2. I was treated with disrespect.
3. They ruined my sunny-side up spirit.

One thing that really pulls my nerve is when someone is sarcastic when spoken to. My point is, I speak to you kindly, then answer back with the same respect given to you. Isn't that the right thing to do to people? Was that so hard to do? I mean, to be kind? Golden Rule. Golden Rule. Golden Rule. I can't stress that enough.

After that event one fine morning, I thought of presenting this tips on how to avoid raging bulls in the office:

Here's one:
Look the other way. Try to avoid eye contact. You'll never know when he or she will pop your eyes out. ;)

Here's another:
Try to become invisible for a day or at least until the rage wears down. If you need to relay a message or have important matters to discuss with the raging bull then go through the assistant, if he or she has one. I just did that. If I could fold myself into several folds, I would have done that so I could put myself in my own pocket!

And another:
Play some funky tunes to cast the blues away. Music is like a therapy to calm my nerves. Just don't play heavy metal, head banging, ear drums crashing music or it will make you more upset. Tone down with a good "zen" like music or easy listening stuff. I played "Amazing Grace" in my head over and over until I cooled down. Another music which calms my nerves is blues/jazzy tune. Never disappoints me at all.

Last trick I tried:
I offered a prayer. I was scared of losing it too because I just gave them a reason to ruin my composure. Well, they actually did but to give in to such negative feeling is something I will not subject myself to. I owe it to myself to be happy and happy I will be. Bulls or none...

So, there will be another day again and this will be my prayer:

"As I enter the work area Lord, please give me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference...and while I am at it Lord, please don't make me too strong because I might just throw them all away." hehehehe Just kidding Lord. =)

(photo courtesy of: www.yesnet.yk.ca)

Living with Inconsiderate People

It is really difficult to enjoy a peaceful and stress-free life when you are surrounded by inconsiderate people 24/7. All I ever wish is go to work without any hassle and come home to a place where I can relax and enjoy the time away from work. However, these little "perks" I thought I will enjoy at home is ruined by others who are simply disrespectful and inconsiderate.

Inconsiderate people are those who make your smooth ride in life bumpy and chaotic.  They are those rocks along the street of life that you just want to kick on the side of the dirt road. If only you can do that in real life.

These are people who will really test your patience. They are the inconsiderate ones who are either rude in nature, simply ignorant and selfish, disrespectful and plain insensitive to others' right to a quiet, peaceful and private life. You meet them everywhere and if you're lucky, you may even live with one. 

I am fairly a patient and considerate person who will try to adjust and hold on my anger if I can. But sometimes, the calm waters are tested and your patience teetering to a snap. What do you do then?

There are ways to live your way around them if you have no choice like I do. Here are some tips I have employed to be able to go through life knowing that no matter what diplomacy and tactic I do to convey the message across, I will really still have to make an effort to work and live my way and life around them.

1. Ignore them.

This seems to be an easy thing to do but it's rather difficult especially if the person or people you find inconsiderate is or are actually living in the same place as you are. If you cannot afford to live solo then you might as well face the fact and try to live harmoniously with the person involved.

My principle in life is, anything that or anyone who causes me stress are simply wiped off my list of people I have to deal with. I just ignore them completely. It is the fair thing to do for yourself. Never mind them. 

2. Express your concerns to the person involved in a very diplomatic way.

I did this many times and the same inconsiderate person just keeps doing it over and over again. One reminder is fine, twice is okay but three times or more? It clearly shows the person involved is really mindless and does not care about you, let alone respect you. So practice rule # 1 now - ignore.

3. Put reminders everywhere to give consideration and respect to everyone.

It's like treating a small kid. You have to constantly remind them that they have an indirect obligation to other people too. If they are not dense and have a thin skull then they will get the message across. But if you're unlucky as I am, then go back to rule # 1 - ignore.

4. This is only for the brazen (like myself!). Confront with the intent to instill fear to the inconsiderate person. And be ready to face the consequences afterwards.

Since I have been dealing with the same riffraff at home for many years now, I have already lost track of the number of times I begged, pleaded, requested and reminded the inconsiderate person to practice respect and give consideration to others (And come to think of it, I am older than the person in question and respect is not given to me. Now you can imagine what type of person I am dealing with). None happened so I had to go to the mattress and fight the war. Yes, it will be an ugly scene at home and brace yourself because this act can actually ruin and sever the ties you have with the person involved. In my case, I could care less now. I can never associate myself with people who make my life a living hell. I deserve a peaceful day at home and if I have to fight for it, I will. Come on, I am the matriarch of the house and to be treated like this only shows that the person is truly hardcore inconsiderate and disrespectful person. Changing that person is like asking for snow in the Sahara.

Being a Good House Guest

I know my manners and I keep them checked at all times. Whenever we visit other people's house, we behave properly and respect the other members of the household.

I am a good house guest, that I can vouch for. However, I seem to be a magnet of people who are inconsiderate or simply ignorant. I don't know why other people in my household bring guests who think they own my place, do not know they are guests, bangs door, noisy kids and parents do not reprimand them, do not know when to tone down their voices and just don't care about the time of the day. I don't mind if it happens at 7 p.m. or even up to midnight, but at freaking 3:45 a.m.??? Common on! I have work in the morning for crying out loud!

That is my house too but as the ever-gracious hostess (actually, they are NOT my guests but someone in the house's), do I just shrug my shoulders and suffer in silence or do I firmly remind them to pipe it down?

If you are in my place, what will you do?